Finishing Flowers

Some gorgeous flowers from Sharon & Simon:

Funky Flower Card from the Colyers:

Thanks guys, they're lovely x

Thank You

A couple of thank yous needed for:

• Hannah for her fab chemo cards that arrive before every session

• Auntie Lee for my beautiful freesia bouquet

• Amy & Andy for their card and fab interchangeable boyfriend beanie

 

Thanks guys, means loads to know you're thinking bout me :)

#StillGotMoreHairThanMy Dad

This week has been pretty busy which is good, each day that passes is a day closer to getting through chemo.

 

On Tuesday I had my LGFB course in the afternoon and then in evening I went to Book Club. I'm trying to think but I don't recall actually talking about the book once! We did have fab chats, takeaway (well I had vegetable noodles - yawn), played with Mary's beautiful kids (Mary has a fab blog - see here), looked at Pinterest and played with bead craft.

 

On Wednesday my dad came over for dinner and bought some fab pressies with him, some lovely coasters and this picture which is already up in the kitchen as it matches perfectly with our colours:

It was really good to have a catch up, he brought "the world's best quiche" for dinner which was scrummy and we watched the Paralympics Opening Ceremony. I still have more hair than him too which made us both laugh :)

 

 

 

This week I received some flowers from one of my work suppliers which was really kind:

 

 

Grazie Enoitalia :)

 

Yesterday I FINALLY (after a fortnight of stress and worrying about it) got through my new date for chemo (as next week I'll be changing drugs to Docetaxel - hereafter T or Tax). I'm meeting with the Guildford Chemo nurses on Wednesday next week and then starting chemo on Friday. It's the same routine, 3 chemo sessions, 1 every 3 weeks. To be honest I'm pretty scared about moving onto T as people talk about getting hit by the Tax Truck. Where FEC makes you feel sick, tired and hurts your veins, Tax is more joint pain and neuralgia and it can make you lose your nails, eyelashes and eyebrows :( You can read more about it here I've just got to remember that the SEs are all temporary and it's for the greater good (doesn't stop me feeling frightened though).

Shrinkage

Had my après-chemo meeting with the oncologist this afternoon and the great news is that the cancer has already shrunk by 0.5cm :)

Lovely flowers on my desk at work from Anne as I helped her with some Excel work - thanks Anne

Feeling Strangely Fine

Actually feeling okay at the moment, a few side effects but nothing too bad at the moment. Hoping & praying that this is not the calm before the storm....

Lovely bouquet arrived from Mum & Col this avo:

Comet, Chemo, Cold Cap & Chips!

Today Rob, Mum & I went to Comet Ward to understand about more about the chemo I was having, where it would be, procedure etc etc.

Tried on the Cold Cap for size when I was there (I've got a huge head so was the largest size they offer!) which is what I'm going to use to try and save my hair. Apparently it works in 50% of cases so let's hope i'm lucky. The vain part of me is really scared about losing my hair but it's a small price to pay I guess!

Was all a little overwhelming but at least I'm more informed now :)

In the evening Dad came over and it was great to see him & chat everything through. We had fish & chips for dinner & watched some episodes of The Inbetweeners which was lovely & normal - just what I needed.

The florists continues to grow: Lovely Orchid from Mum & Col & gorgeous bouquet from Dad.....

Times Like These

Slept a bit better for the first time in days which I really needed. Put on my ipod as I was getting dressed and the Foo Fighters "Times Like These" came on. The lyrics seem pretty profound to me at the moment.

Got two lovely cards in the post today, one from G'ma & G'pa (Rob's grandparents):

I also had a fab homemade one from Hannah sending lots of love my way:

Went over to Rob's mum and dad's today to explain yesterday to them. It's good to have such a great support network around me.

Whilst we were out I had some lovely flowers delivered from work, luckily Leanne was around to take them in for us:

Later that evening I also got some fab flowers delivered from my team with a card reading "Get better immediately! Love and Support, The Buying Team". I'll certainly try guys!

The flat is starting to resemble a florists :)

Limbo Land

Last night I didn't sleep at all, kept being sick, twisting and turning in bed, my mind was churning with non-stop thoughts. I don't know what to do, how to be.

We got up really early and walked the dog, trying to have some sort of normality.

Got back and a little later I got some beautiful flowers from Kelly:

A little later Amanda & Paul came over for a good chat. My phone was ringing and beeping with texts non-stop - feel blessed to have such lovely family and friends.

Mum and Colin went to tell Nanny today so she rung me a little later in tears which was fairly hard to listen to.

Later Michelle came over with some goodies (long since eaten):

and we had a good hug, cry, walk with Fagin and chat. Later Caroline came over and gave me a big hug, some lovely flowers (from her, Mo & Steve) and some choccy:

Feels good to be chatting with people but I can't stop feeling worried sick.

It feels like a crazy, horrid dream, like a rollercoaster that I can't get off. The organised control freak part of me needs answers, deadlines, timescales etc and I'm currently stuck in limbo-land.

The Waiting Game

Spent this week trying to push Friday to the back of my mind but Thursday 21st June (despite being told not to) I caved and looked at Dr Google. I found a lot of scary information out there but I also found some great sites including http://community.breastcancer.org/ It's a fantastic site, based in America so some of the treatment, procedures etc are different but the feelings are the same. The "sisters" offer help and support to each other, I'm just praying I don't need to join their club.

Received some lovely flowers from Amanda & Paul