A Bad Fall

The PICC line

I am woken early and told I am about to be taken down for an operation to insert a PICC (Peripherally Inserted Central Catheter) line. I am barely awake and for a while through a hazy fug I fight with this doctor about this. I know I react badly to anyone putting anything in my veins. But basically it’s tough shit. The nurses are going to be giving me daily IVs (tbc) and taking daily bloods. They need to do this somehow and a PICC is the best way rather than a daily stabbing. The PICC is allows bloods out and treatment in so it really is the best solution. I agree and am wheeled to theatre carrying Recky to squeeze throughout the op.

Once down in theatre I am warned of the risks: The PICC line can move out of position if it is not secured in place (with sutures). There is a risk of vein clotting (thrombosis) or vein inflammation (phlebitis). You may get an infection at the insertion site or in your bloodstream. The PICC may need to be removed and you may need antibiotics. I sign the consent forms.

I am then prepared for the op. They remove the old cannula. The docs clean my arm, and use an ultrasound machine to find the deepest and best vein to use. One doc injects my arm with anaesthetic and it fecking hurts. I grip Recky as tightly as I can with my other hand and squeal with the pain. My veins are so bad but luckily the doc gets the big bugger needle in first time to get the line in place. The other doc finishes off by doing an xray to make sure it’s all in situ perfectly (which thank goodness it is!).

If needs be the PICC can apparently stay in your arm for 12 months 😮, average is apparently 6 months. I’m only prepared to keep this in whilst I’m in hospital. It’s flappy and annoying. It’s restrictive and if when I’m out I’m not having IV chemo then why do I need it in. Whilst in hospital I’ll need the dressing changed at least once a week and a regular flush through.

Michelle comes to see me but I am fast asleep, she leaves some goodies for me and disappears without waking me. Bless her. I wake up to an awful smell, the woman in the bed to the right of me has shat the bed.... It really smells 🙈

 My arm begins to feel bloody sore already.

The temporary tape holding the PICC in place is really itchy but they have to leave the PICC uncovered for 24 hours after the op just to monitor it. 

Laura visits that evening and I am a bit more awake and talking than I have been before which is cool. She tells me about her cool visit to the USA and some exciting exploits she got up to! I remember really liking her jacket and weirdly I dream about it that night. 

A Weekend of Not Quite Right

19th May - I feel atrocious. I am in bed trying to breathe, trying not to cry and in between fitful sleep watching some of the Royal Wedding. I eventually get out of bed about 1pm, shower and feel like I’m going to faint. Why has this drain procedure made me feel this way when last time I felt relief and posted a photo of me smiling?! This thoracocentesis only drained 600ml, the one before was so much more. Maybe the fact they went into the same area? Anyway, regardless of why it's bloody sore!

I struggle downstairs and onto the sofa. Everything is an extraordinary effort. I want to go to London Wine Fair 😭 This is looking less and less likely. We have friends round for dinner, I can hardly remember this. I feel and look like crap. I know Sarah, Dave and Bob came. I cannot tell you what we ate or what we did or what we talked about. Weird.

20th May - I am beyond sad. I cannot do LWTF, I’m too ill. I am gutted. Face facts Jojo. I cannot remember if I called anyone at work to let them know. I really hope I did.

I spend the day in the garden or on the sofa trying to feel better. I’m exhausted. It doesn’t feel right. The last drain at the end of April made me feel better. This is not the same. Pop, pop, pop. I cannot get it out of my head. Just walking to get a glass of water is extraordinarily hard. I feel so light-headed. I try and eat. I think I have pitta and marmite.

Rob returns from helping with his grandma's garden, he always does so much for everyone. I love him very much. I tell him I’m not quite right, about my day of exhaustion, despite all the relaxation attempts. We agree to wait until tomorrow before we escalate things, there’s something amiss, but we both feel nothing is requiring immediate medical attention as we have checked my temperature and pulse which both appear to be normal. I will call Southwater Surgery tomorrow and get checked out at an emergency appointment.

Rob took this photo of me on Sunday afternoon. Looking at it now I really don’t look very well at all.

Tietze Syndrome

Cancer is the gift that keeps on giving. I'm currently really suffering from something called Tietze Syndrome. As I said in January I was shitting myself as I had swelling in my chest but the docs said it was nothing to worry about and diagnosed me with costochondritis. Well since this appointment, it's become more and more painful, at one point at work I sneezed and it hurt so much that I cried out in pain. It's been a struggle to get myself dressed, to drive, to just walk around as normal, it's really painful :( Because my costochondritis is accompanied by swelling, I actually have Tietze Syndrome.

I ended up going back to the doctor who has prescribed me a two week course of naproxen which is supposed to reduce pain and swelling, let's hope it helps!

Wikipedia says:
The main presentation of the syndrome is significant, acute pain in the chest, along with tenderness and some swelling of the cartilages affected, which is commonly palpable on examination. Perceived pain is often exacerbated with respiration, although many times it can be extremely painful, to the point of being debilitating.

Illustration By Henry Vandyke Carter - Henry Gray (1918) Anatomy of the Human Body

The reason I started this post with "cancer is the gift that keeps on giving" is because I have found out:

Patients who have had radiation therapy to the chest/breast will often experience this syndrome which can occur shortly after therapy or years later

Thanks universe, I must have been a right shit in a past life....